Me: I’m rewatching Winter Soldier.
Me: The jokes just feel so forced.
RCF: Yeah… Uncomfortable.
RCF: Apparently in the new one Iron Man and Ant Man and Falcon have lots of jokes. Which will be good.
Me: Oh that’s good. I’ve heard good things.
RCF: Fingers crossed!
Me: If it’s kinda blah, we’ll have What’s Your Number waiting for us. Gay Falcon and Nekked Cap. What could be better?
Me: And Confused Watson.
Me: And Even More Confused Star-Lord.
Me: Actually Martin Freeman is in Civil War too so we’re basically just going to watch the Civil War cast in a comedy where they should be.
RCF: So much greatness.
Me: Seriously every time the shield goes on his back, he’s a turtle.
Me: Like I’m watching a Franklin book come to life.
Franklin Catches Terrorists
Franklin Learns a Lesson in Distrust
Franklin Finds His Long-lost BFF
Franklin Talks to a German Computer
Franklin Doesn’t Wear a Helmet on His Motorbike
Franklin Gets Nostalgic
Franklin Visits a Museum
Franklin Takes a Nostalgic Walk Down Memory Lane
Franklin Wishes He Could Have Slept with Peggy
Me: Nick Fury just said “Secure office” and his office was secure. Do you think he’s ever sat in there and said out loud, “Man I have such a secure office,” and then his office secures and he’s like, “Gawddammit!”
Me: Sammy J has a machine gun in his centre console.
Me: Bucky! He’s pretty cool… Even if he does overdo the Adele cat eye tutorial.
Me: I want Cap to yell out “I’M COMIN’ FOR YOU BUCKY!” like Mindy.
RCF: He should!
“What do you see?”
“HIS BEAUTIFUL HAIR!”
“HIS GIANT METAL ARM!”
RCF: You need to make that comic
Me: The Mindy rom-com crossover featuring the bromance of Bucky and Steve?
Me: And then Tony’s all… “But I thought we had something special…”
Me: Do you think he ever gets sick of having a hot bod? Like every time he goes white t-shirt shopping he thinks, “Ugh why are my pecs so huge! It looks like I’m trying to show them off, but I just want to wear a white tee!”
RCF: I think testosterone overrides any of that.
Me: Fair enoof.
Me: The Apple guy. “Specimen.”
Me: Funniest character in this movie.
Me: Oh my gosh. Mr Computer. This is the worst ever.
RCF: So baaaad!
Me: Like… shockingly ridiculously bad. HOW DID EVERYONE TAKE THIS SERIOUSLY?
RCF: I DON’T KNOW! Mind boggling.
Me: And I’m sorry Toby Jones, your Swiss German accent is also the wooorst.
RCF: So bad.
Me: Bald bespectacled man said Stephen Strange!
Me: He’s talking about the algorithm that chooses who to kill “Bruce Banner, Stephen Strange…”
Me: They’re currently taking a page out of Speed‘s playbook by sliding down a highway on a door – doesn’t Sandy do that?
Me: They’re shooting each other up on an overpass and I’m waiting for Deadpool to drop in.
RCF: Deadpool should show up in all movies.
Me: Not to save anyone. Just to sass things up and then leave.
Me: Cap just told Falcon to “gear up” and I want him to say “Wing up!”
Me: Okay second funniest character in this movie – Abed.
RCF: Oh yeah!!
Me: “Spread your wings and flyyyyyy!”
Me: I wonder if Cap is the wing beneath Falcon’s wings.
Me: How often do you think they sing Seal’s “Fly Like an Eagle” to Falcon?
RCF: I hope every day.
Me: Do you think someone told Cap his outfit was corny and he said “I’m looking for corny in my life” like Kate Winslet?
Me: I do appreciate how Bucky grabs one of Falcon’s wings like he’s a lil butterfly.
RCF: Well yeah.
RCF: Don’t go against the Winter Soldier if you’re a little bird.
Me: Exactly! Winter Soldier means bidness.
Me: Cap is yelling “Drop it! Drop it!” at Bucky and that’s what I yell at the dog when he’s got something he shouldn’t.
RCF: Bad Bucky!
Me: “Bucky nooooo!”
RCF: “Bucky yiss!”
Me: Okay it is a pretty cool movie and worth a rewatch now that we can talk out the hilarity of certain scenes.
RCF: Well I loved the action scenes, but it was hard to forgive some of that ridiculousness.
Me: It’s easier to forgive once you’ve already forgiven it once.