Don’t worry, I did not have drugs.
I mean, if you know me that’s not a huge surprise, but let’s be honest, most of you don’t know me.
The thing is, because I did not and have never had drugs, I didn’t think about the implications of a drug-sniffing dog coming up to me in a London airport while my friend and I were trying to figure out how to deal with the aftermath of getting screwed by Ryanair.
On a tangential note, don’t ever fly with Ryanair. I know it seems like such a good deal because it’s basically the price of a cup of Costa coffee (British coffee shop joke), but then there are all these random hoops they make you jump through that other airlines, like EasyJet, would never dream of putting you through.
Like, for example, the small print of needing to get your boarding pass stamped before you go through security and get to the gate, which my friend and I did not do, so we had to be escorted back “into” the country to pay an astronomical price for a new ticket for the next Ryanair flight going out in two hours, after we’d already wandered around duty free for two hours.
So while standing at the desk talking to a lovely British lady about the unexpected £120 we had to pay, a dog and its owner/handler came up behind me to smell both myself and my bag. My immediate reaction was to talk to said dog in an inordinately high-pitched voice as if it was an ordinary puppy on the street, while everyone around me froze because they knew what it meant if a dog approaches you in an airport.
The dog moved on pretty quickly and when I stood up to talk to said British lady again, I saw her even paler face and realized what that could have meant. It took her a second to break out of her frozen-by-fear state and sell us our new tickets and thankfully we laughed it off pretty quickly.
So in future, if a dog approaches you in an airport, try to remember not to assume it just loves you and wants to be your best friend.
Or do. Maybe it was okay that my reaction wasn’t one of fear and panic.