I wasn’t going to confess this because I thought I was the only one. But then my friend said the exact same thing after I introduced her to John Mulaney’s New in Town on Netflix – which we’ve both watched multiple times.
When I’m home, I tend to rather obsessively listen to comedians like John Mulaney, Trevor Noah and my favourite British and Irish funny people – you know, like a really cool person does. And I start to think, “I could do this. I could totally do this.”
As John Mulaney talks about his favourite show, Law & Order: SVU, I tell myself, “You do that all the time. Amy, your life is spent talking about television and movies. You have no other conversational topics to offer. You can totally do this.”
As Trevor Noah talks about the perils of speaking German in Germany with too much confidence, I think, “Remember when you were in Germany, Amy? Remember when your German language teacher found out you spoke basic French and she asked you if you were feeling ‘ooh la la’ and you realized she meant ‘comme ci comme ça’ but didn’t correct her because she annoyed you so much you just enjoyed the fact that you knew she was wrong as much as she thought she was right? That’s a story people could laugh at!”
When I watch Jon Richardson talk about his OCD or hear David O’Doherty list off his grievances with the world, I consider how much material is in my list of 500+ Things That Annoy Amy and I think, “Yeah, it’s all there! I could sit precariously on a stool, read those and make people laugh!”
And then I start to really think about it. Like, really think about it. And I consider how much I love sitting on my couch in the evenings, and how the idea of going out to weirdly muggy bars and clubs actually makes me feel ill. I remember how much I don’t like people. And how crowds give me anxiety. And how as much as I love making people laugh, to try and turn it into a job seems like a daunting and depressing endeavour.
And then I’m all, “I could totally do that.”